Sensory seeking.

Right after Gabriel turned two years old, he was diagnosed with two things.  He needed speech therapy for his slow language development and occupational therapy for his sensory processing disorder. 

It was at the time that I questioned therapists and development specialists about autism. Friends, family, and specialists all reassured me that he didn't have autism.  We all know how that turned out three years later.  

Any way, when he was two years old, I remember he acted like a little animal.  I could not control him. He plowed into furniture, knocking over our dining room table and chairs repetitively.  I swear I could have cut off his arm and he wouldn't have felt it.  Gabriel ran straight into things without flinching. 

He bit other children and he had no understanding of the pain he caused. Little Gabriel cornered one child in one of the kids tubes and tried to bite this child. Andrew had to maneuver the gerbil tunnels in order to save the screaming child. Several years later we learned that child was a sensory avoider.  Not a good fit for a friendship!

Further, I will admit that I swatted his tush during this time only to get the cutest giggles and laughter. 

That impact on his body felt good. The jolt from running into furniture was a good thing for him.  I later learned that there is a lot of sensory input from the jaw. No wonder he liked to chomp on his friends! 

Our home was modified from baby proofed to sensory seeker home.  We had an indoor trampoline and the kids rode scooters and small bikes all over house.  We constantly had rice bins and play dough available for sensory seeking. We also had bean bag chairs in order to smush and roll Gabriel. 

He is 8 years old now.  His sensory seeking is still obvious in certain situations. When Gabriel watches a movie, he tends to lay upside down. He chews on things and fidgets. His dance lessons help him get his sensory seeking fulfilled. 

One thing I have to keep in mind because as the days and years roll on, I tend to forget - when he is able to meet those sensory needs, his brain organizes itself better. 

Harmony Community School - here we come!

13 months ago we moved from Sioux City, Iowa to Celebration, Florida. Celebration is a gorgeous little Disney town near Disney. We LOVE it. We could walk to the restaurants and events with the kids. We were able to meet other people in our area with children. It is a lovely place and add a wine bar within walking distance from our townhouse and it was perfect for us. However, the school was far from perfect for us. The school told us from the beginning that they could not accommodate Gabriel's special needs. The school wanted to send him to a school 40 minutes away to an ASD classroom. We visited the classroom and while it is a fit for some ASD students, it was not a fit for Gabriel. He went from 80% secluded special education to 80% general education in K. Why would we backtrack and put him back where the teachers were dealing serious behavior management? Last year in September I wanted to keep Gabriel at his school and walk him to his classroom. That is all I wanted. I didn't even care if his other things were included on his IEP. I wasn't allowed to walk him to his room. In fact, a teacher stepped out of her room one day and screamed at me stating that I was not allowed in the school. Gabriel would have to walk with the other students. I will admit that I lost my patienct and told her that the school was out of compliance with Gabriel's IEP and if she wanted to be apart of the problem, I would happily include her name in my complaint. She finally moved out of my way and allowed me to procced. Geeze, I just wanted to get my child to his classroom safely without him wandering which he has done in the past at his other school. Did this teacher want to risk losing him? Strict rules were all this teacher wanted to worry about rather than the safety of my child. Fast forward to when we hired an advocate. I didn't even know advocates existed and certainly never thought I would need one. Surely, schools, teachers, staff, people in the business of educating children were interested in helping me educate my child? This was not the case with our sweet Gabriel. With the help of our advocate, we were able to keep him at the school and set up a system to get him safely (albeit one time) to his classroom. He had a coteacher, OT and speech services. Once we had a solid IEP written, I felt comfortable with the situation. Though that comfort level quickly changed. On a couple incidents, Gabriel's teacher stomped, yes, literally stomped, down the sidewalk to hand me my son. It was one of the most unprofessional things I have ever seen. I swear I saw steam coming out of her ears. My anxiety was high every day. Gabriel was supposed to be escorted to the gate every day for safety reasons but this did not happen. Instead, he would wander to the gate at the end of the day. Usually 10-15 minutes after dismissal. All of the other parents were already gone. One time a parent began panicking because their child wasn't at the gate at their usual time. I wanted to hug her - Yes, I feel your panick EVERY DAY. Little did I realize that just because an IEP is written, doesn't mean they will follow through. At the end of the school year, a therapist apologized for dropping the ball on Gabriel's sensory diet. While I appreciated the apology, she had a full school year to implement something. I supplied the teacher with things that helped Gabriel. Nothing was used. In fact, the teacher demanded that Gabriel wear a belt. Since it is a requirement of the county school uniform, I complied. I purchase several different types of belts. Gabriel worked on the best with his OT and showed that he could perform the task of doing a belt. What the teacher and OT did not understand is that many ASD children have "leaky gut" which is forceful diarrhea. He could not unbuckle his belt fast enough to make it to the toilet and he had an accident. Even after this incident, the teacher insisted that he wear a belt! Later, I asked that "no belt necessary" would be written on his IEP. I was told that they didn't want to take away this important life skill. Seriously? But having a poop accident in the classroom is age approproiate? Does this really need to be a fight for everything? A friend asked, "now that you are a trained advocate, why don't you stay and fix Celebration's attitude?" I really thought I could. I wanted to but what I've learned is that I can work with parents on their children's needs in the school. What I can't do is change the attitude of entire team who doesn't want the best for my child. I'm too emotionally involved in my own child's education and experience. I don't want to sacrifice my child's education for that of the possibility of changing a system. To be honest, I was sick of being anxious and I was sick of being yelled at by professional adults. So with that experience, we decided to tour private schools. I was hopeful that an ASD school would be our answer. It was a wonderful school but it wasn't the school for Gabriel. We toured NINE private schools. All of them were good or even great but they didn't seem to fit Gabriel's needs. We decided to try another public school.

We packed up our family and moved to a larger yet less expensive home in Harmony. As the summer progressed, my anxiety has grown. This is a big question mark - we've heard Harmony has a great school and it's A rated but we heard the same thing about Celebration. Maybe we would at least have a better start given that we have an IEP from the same county. I've had a conversation with the assistant principal and the compliance specialist at our new school. Neither one has told me that they can not accommodate my child. Both of them have told me that they want Gabriel to succeed. They want to meet with me prior to school starting. They want to work with me and they have an open door policy. The compliance specialist also told me that they have a sensory program in place. WOW! I shed many tears after this past year of school. I am now hopeful. No system is perfect but maybe this will be our answer.