Why? Why do I even ask why any more?

Why do we have two whole pineapples I asked my husband after he went to the grocery store. Autism was his answer. Why do we have two huge bunches of bananas I asked him after the same grocery store trip. Autism was his answer. A friend asked why do you have cologne in your van at all times? Autism was my answer. Why does he throw himself on the floor at a restaurant, complaining about the smell of meat asked a friend. Autism was all I could answer. Why are you trying to cut yourself with my dull razor my husband asked him as he was screaming in the bath tub. Autism was his reply. To get rid of the autism. Why is your home full of red items someone once asked me. My reply - autism. My world is a crazy one at times. We have red furniture and decorations throughout our home because he can not deviate from his favorite color. I recently read his diagnosis from when he turned 5 and the dr. and he suggested we make tiny steps toward helping him get past these color issues. He's capable of wearing other colored clothing now. That's a BIG difference from two years ago. It took teeny tiny baby steps to get there. Gabriel will think he smells at random moments throughout our day. There is cologne placed throughout our home and vehicles to stop a meltdown due to his newly found overly sensitive smalling powers. To avoid a temper tandrum in a public place, we often buy more fruit and vegetables than we can consume. We try hard to avoid being wasteful but there is a limit to the amount of pineapple a family can consume in a matter of days. So why not just let him throw the fit, you might be wondering? Because he's 7. He's a tall, skinny 7 year old. It looks ridiculous in public. There are times when we know he can work through something and there are times when we know he can not. He just can't get past whatever moment is stuck in his head. It's called AUTISM. He isn't being a brat. Don't get me wrong, there are moments when he makes poor choices but many times, it's his disability. Thankfully we can afford the extra pineapple and we can find ways to make pineapple interesting for consumption even when we are sick of it. Pinapple smoothie, anyone? This is my life. I'm always hoping to be one step ahead of a meltdown but it doesn't work that way. What worked yesterday doesn't solve today's new problem. But it's better than it was a year ago and far better than it was two years ago and for that I am grateful. Take that Autism! In the meantime, we'll buy extra bananas and pineapple when needed. At least it's healthy.