Social Cues

There is a fine line between explaining a disability and using it as an excuse for bad choices and behavior. I try very hard to stay on the side of explaining Gabriel's behavior but I'm sure that it can sound like I'm giving him an excuse. It's a tough battle when dealing with things like social cues. Since Gabriel was a toddler I've had to explain social cues to him. Say "hi" to the clerk at the store. Shake hands with the neighbor. Give your grandmother a hug. I thought it was the difference between girls and boys - maybe boys needed everything explained to them. It wasn't until later that I realized he can't read social cues. He wants to make friends and he wants to talk to other people but he doesn't know how to do it. He doesn't understand personal boundaries. Up until recently, he went up to other people and asked, "what's your name?" I taught him to say, "Hi. I'm Gabriel. What is your name?" It took a couple months for him to understand how to do this but it seems like a mastered task now. However, I failed how to teach him how to get the attention of the other person. To my embarrassment, he has been grabbing women's breasts to get their attention. He puts the woman's breast in his entire hand and she is stuck there. It works. The woman can't go anywhere but I am in shock every time he does it. It's better than when he bit kids to get their attention. I'm glad that behavior is gone but I have to work on this new problem. Who knew he would grab a woman's breast to get their attention? Seriously, he's 7. Thankfully no one has made a big issues out of it but it needs to stop before he gets any older and gets arrested. Yep, the joys of autism.